


Familiar stranger

by countrygirlita



Category: The Big Valley
Genre: Gen, big valley au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-17
Updated: 2019-07-17
Packaged: 2020-06-30 08:17:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19849192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/countrygirlita/pseuds/countrygirlita
Summary: Someone who everyone thought dead arrive at the ranch





	Familiar stranger

It was a crisp, autumn afternoon when a blond man riding double with his son approached the gate leading to the Barkley's ranch. The man was in his mid-thirties, his clothes were worn as well as his son's. He was too thin and his face was showing the anxiety he felt for the upcoming meeting. He heard the Barkleys were fair when hiring, but he wasn't sure that they would hire a cowhand with a small kid to look after, but he would do anything to keep his son with him.

When he first arrived in Stockton, he noticed the odd looks some of its inhabitants gave to him, Maybe he had lived here in the past but he couldn't tell, he was a man with no past/ He was found by his future wife in a cold winter night nearly dying, and when she asked about his name he couldn't give one, it had been seven years since then, but he still didn't remembered anything. The only things that popped up in his brain were two names Nick and Heath. He decided to call himself Nick, he didn't know if it was his real name or someone he had known in the past maybe it was a question that would have gone unanswered . When his son was born he named him Heath, a tie for his forgotten past.

It was the rumbling of his son's stomach that brought him back to the real world.

"Heath, don't worry when we arrive at the Barkley's I will ask for some leftovers." He hated this situation he wasn't able to feed his own son, and soon it would be winter and they didn't have clothes warm enough to afford the cold season. He prayed that the foreman would hire him, Heath was old enough to look after himself and he could always tell that his son could work as well in the stables or doing chores around the ranch, it wouldn't be the first time and wouldn't be the last time that his son had earned his keep.

"Papa I ain't hungry..." but his small lie was covered by another rumble from his stomach.

"Heath, you are hungry it's been yesterday that you have eaten something, when we get to the Barkley's, I'm pretty sure that they will give you something."

"But Papa, you didn't eat yesterday, for sure you are hungry too?"

"Heath you are a growing boy and you need to eat."

"Excuse me, I'm looking for the foreman, I've heard that you are looking for some hands." He asked when he arrived at the ranch.

The man looked at the stranger and was shocked at the similarities between him and the deceased Mr. Barkley, he simply pointed in the direction of the stables. "Ask for Duke McCall," was all he managed to say.

When he arrived at the stables there was one man, ready to mount a horse.

"Mr. McCall?" he asked hoping he was the right man.

Duke turned around at the sound of the familiar voice, it had been years since he had heard it, he was changed but he was sure that in front of him stood his friend who disappeared seven years ago. The man in front of him seemed not to recognize him, "maybe it's only someone that looks like him." he thought.

"Mr. McCall." he repeated for the second time.

"Yes?" he replied.

"My name is Nick, I've heard that the Barkley's are hiring and I was hoping that were some places left."

'It's him, I'm sure but why he doesn't recognize me and why he wants to be hired and who's the kid with him?' he thought.

"Yes we are hiring, but I think it's better that we speak in the study, please follow me, you can hitch your horse here." He croaked out.

The man followed Duke in the big house, meanwhile Duke was hoping that she wasn't around it would be a great shock to see him alive when everyone thought that he had died.

"Papa, I've never saw a house so big." Whispered Heath in awe as soon as they entered in the mansion.

Nick was puzzled, it was strange for a simple hiring he was conducted in the master house, but he followed Mr. McCall amazed at the grandeur of the house.

As soon they entered in the study, Duke closed the door behind him and readied himself to face his friend, it was clear that he didn't remembered him, 'maybe he lost his memory, I've heard that someone could lose his memory but I've never thought it was possible.'

"Mr. McCall as I said before I'm looking for work and I'm willing to do everything..."

"Sorry to interrupt but I didn't catch your name..."

"My name is Winter, Nick Winter. As I said before I'm willing to do everything even mucking stables; all I ask is room and board, for my kid and myself."

"You don't ask for much, if I may what's happened to the kid's mother?" asked Duke while thinking on much his friend changed even in his behavior.

"My wife died nearly two years ago and..." He was interrupted by some yelling coming from outside the room.

"Where's the bastard! He got guts..."

"Sorry Mr. Winter, I'll be back immediately." He said while leaving the room hastily

He met with Nick in the foyer, stopping him from entering the study.

"Duke, some hand just told me that he's alive and he's back towing a kid, for sure he got balls to come here after seven years as nothing had happened, she will be devastated, she always said that he didn't died that he was still alive and now he pops up..."

"Nick simmer down for the grace of God, it's not as it seems. He doesn't know who he is, he just came here only because he heard that we were hiring and he told me that his name is Nick Winter; I reckon he lost his memory somehow. "

"This is crazy, how can you be sure that he's not making it up?"

"Nick I looked at him when he introduced himself and he didn't recognize me. a bit and I saw his eyes he is lying. I think right now that you should come with me and see what's going to happen."

"All right I will follow your lead."

"Mr. Winter, this is Nick Barkley and before hiring he want to ask you some questions."

"Nice to meet you." He said extending his hand

Nick was barely able to mask his shock, to be face to face with his brother that he thought dead, he had changed and it was pretty creepy to introduce himself to his own brother.

"Duke just told me that you are looking for a job, do you have any references, where did you work before coming here?"

"I worked for a spell in a mining town called Midas, but after a cave in, where I busted my leg, I was fired, after that I did some ranch work around the valley but I wasn't able to keep the works for long.." He added with a whisper. "I'm a strong worker all I ask is a chance, I don't like begging but I have a my son to think of and lately lady luck wasn't at my side, since my wife's death everything seemed to go down hill from there."

"I'm sorry for your loss, before the mine where did you work?"

"I had a small ranch up north with my wife and my brother-in-law, but the bank took everything some months after her death."

"Where do you hail from?"

"I don't know, my wife found me during a winter storm seriously wounded and she nursed me back to health, when I regained consciousness I didn't know who I was, I could recall only two names; Nick and Heath, so I picked Nick and since I was found during a winter storm I found appropriate to chose Winter as a surname."

Nick was speechless, here in front of him was his, once proud, brother begging for some work, all the anger inside him was gone after hearing his story, he really didn't what to do, even thought the person in front of him was his brother he was a stranger changed by the last seven years. He decided to stick with his "boss" part hoping that she wasn't around and decided to peek in the study.

"So you said that you were fired in the mine, can you tell me the reason?"

"As I said there was a cave in, and I broke my leg badly, at first the foreman didn't fire me but he wanted to hire Heath in my place as a charge boy...I refused; mines aren't a place for children."

'My God he worked in his own mine and nearly died there,' Nick thought.

"Mr. Barkley I know you own the Midas mine, and I don't know your opinion regarding kids working in a mine but I would rather go begging in the streets rather than allow my son work as a charge boy, so when I refused his offer he fired me, the next couple of months were pretty grim, I couldn't move and work, there was my brother-in-law that helped sending money but it wasn't enough so my kid started to work in the stables; it was the only way to keep food on our table and pay the medical expenses."

"Mr. Winter, it's Barkley's policy that no one under twelve is allowed to work in our mines and I can assure you that the Midas' foreman will be fired as soon as possible." Nick found it harder each passing minute to maintain this charade, all he wanted was to engulf his brother in a big hug and tell him the truth about his identity, but he wasn't sure about his reaction.

"Mr. Barkley, all I want is a place to work, Heath can do chores around, I wish I could send him to school but if you need him around, I can teach myself his numbers and letters, he's only six but he will earn his keep, he can share my bunk and he's old enough to look after himself when I'm away on the range."

"Mr. Winter i didn't say I wouldn't hire you but..." Nick wasn't able to maintain his composure anymore, here in front of him there was his brother begging for a job, he decided to tell him the truth when he was interrupted.

"I understand Mr. Barkley, you don't want a kid around, I will take my leave then; I only ask if you have some leftovers, we...I mean Heath hasn't eaten since yesterday."

This was too much, his eyes were brimming with unshed tears, Nick Winter was puzzled by Mr. Barkley's reaction, he seemed on the verge on crying and Mr. McCall kept on looking at him as he had a second head.

"Mr. Winter don't worry pretty soon everything will be all right, there's one thing I've wanted to tell since I saw you..." Nick revelation was interupped by a voice from the door frame. The stranger had his back to the door and the newcomer wasn't able to see him in the face.

"Nick, he's back, isn't he. I've told you that he wasn't dead that he was alive somewhere but couldn't come back."

At these words, Nick Winter turned around and faced Victoria Barkley.

"Oh my God, you are alive I always prayed for your safe return." She said while embracing him for the time after more than seven years.

"Ma'am, do I know you?" He asked puzzled, her face was familiar but he couldn't place and for sure she resembled his deceased wife Leah.

"Tom, I'm Victoria your wife."

Chapter 2: Chapter 2  
Everyone still stood for several minutes, none moved or spoke, Victoria was puzzled that his beloved husband didn't recognized her, 'what's happened to him he's so thin and he cut his beard, it's funny but he looks younger without it, and who's that child, he looks like a small version of Tom.' she thought:

"What's going on? I reckon you know me."

"Yes, your name is Thomas Barkley and seven years ago during a business trip you disappeared from the face of the earth, we searched high and low but we couldn't find anything that could lead to you, we wired to every single sheriff and sent your description with a reward for any any information but nothing came up, we thought you were dead Tom. Victoria was the only one that kept the faith that you were alive somewhere."

"Yes, even thought everything pointed out that you were dead in my hearth I knew you were alive, I missed so much." Added Victoria.

He was shattered, in a blink of an eye he had discovered that he had a family. He had always thought that when he would had met someone from his past, his memory would have come back, but so far he couldn't remember anything prior his meeting with Leah.

"Sorry ma'am, I don't remember you, I wish I could, but I can't. I've told Mr. Barkley that I lost my memory seven years ago. When Leah found me back then, all I recalled were two names: Nick and Heath and nothing else."

"Don't worry Tom, everything will be all right now that you are at home." somberly said Victoria. She was overwhelmed with joy by Tom's sudden return but her joy was ruined by Tom's amnesia. Looking at the child and adding the name Leah. Victoria realized that Tom had fallen in love and fathered a child during his absence. The boy looked like around six years old and was hiding behind the tall frame of his father afraid of what was happening around him.

"Tom, I'll send someone for the doctor, maybe he can tell us a cure." Said Nick.

It took some seconds for Tom Barkley to realize that Nick was talking to him, he was used to be called Nick and it was very strange to be called by another name even though it was his own name.

"Thank you, Mr. Barkley, but I spoke with some doctors and everyone told me that there's nothing to do about..."

"Tom, I want another opinion and please don't call me Mr, Barkley, you are my big brother and I still remember when you called me squirt."

"I'll try, but for sure I must get used to be called Tom."

"Papa, who are those people?" Heath asked with a small voice.

"Heath, you know when I told you how I met your mama?" At Heath's nod, he continued. "It seems that they are my family, they were looking for me for a long time."

"You mean we are going to live here?"

Nick replied instead of his brother, "Yes you will live here with your Papa. My name is Nick and I'm you uncle."

"Like Uncle Matt? He's my Mama's brother."

"Yes, I'm your Papa's kid brother."

"Every time I see Uncle Matt he gives me some candy, but it's forever that I don't see him, he lives in the mountain in a small town...I don't remember the name but it's called like a fruit."

"You are a chatter box, aren't you. I don't have any candy right now but what about some cake?"

"Really, it's been forever that I didn't eat a cake, yesterday I ate some bread, can I save some for my papa he didn't eat yesterday."

"Sure Heath," he said with a lump in his throat, "come with me. Duke please go for the doc." He said wanting to leave Tom alone with Victoria.

"Papa, aren't you coming with me?"

"Go with your uncle, Heath."

"So Tom, or I should call Nick..."

"Mrs. Barkley," a stern look from Victoria made Tom rephrased his wording, "I mean Victoria, I really don't know where to start, maybe it's better you start telling more about yourself and the life we had together."

"I have one question, Leah I reckon she's your wife?" She asked afraid of the answer.

"She was my wife she died nearly two years ago, all I left is Heath, our son." Victoria took a breath of relief, if Leah was alive the situation would have been awkward at least.

"He's a nice kid."

"Yes, too bad he suffered too much in the last two years. Victoria do we have children?" He asked blushing.

"Two boys, Jarrod is fourteen and Nick is ten. They think you are dead and I think it will be difficult to explain you sudden reappearance. I will try to explain to them..."

"Thanks, but tell me about how we met..."

At these word she mellowed and started to tell their story hoping that maybe this would help Tom to remember something.

Nick led Heath to the kitchen and briefly explained the situation to Silas, after he cut a big slice of chocolate cake just baked from the oven for dinner and placed the plate in front of Heath.

Heath's eyes where large a saucers when he saw the cake in front of him, he seldom ate cakes and he had enjoyed each time.

"I reckon you like chocolate cake?" He asked teasingly.

"Boy howdy, I like every type of cake, last time I ate one it was for my birthday."

Nick chuckled at the strange expression. "You know I've never heard anyone say 'Boy howdy...you said you ate a cake on your birthday, how old are you?"

"I'm nearly seven," he said with pride, while wolfing down the slice in front of him, "my birthday in on may the fourteenth."

'Just like all kids of his age, he's six and few months and in his opinion he's nearly seven,' Nick thought, he spent several minutes observing his newfound nephew, it was clearly famished and he wanted to slam himself that he didn't put more food on the table, it was clear that Heath wasn't still sure about his place here and maybe too shy to ask for more food, it seemed strange then that Heath stopped halfway the slice he was eating.

"Heath are you all right, I reckoned you were hungry?"

"Still am, but I'm saving it for my Papa, if I finished it he won't anything to eat. I don't eat too much and I always share with Papa, he's hungrier than me, yesterday he didn't eat anything and he gave me some bread, I told him I wasn't hungry but he told me that I'm a growing boy and I need to eat." He said innocently.

It was hard for Nick hearing these words, no child should be allowed to be hungry.

"Don't worry about the cake or the food, here at the ranch we have plenty, see over there? There's the rest of the cake more than enough for you and your Papa for a second even a third helping."

Heath at first was unsure but a simple look at the big cake gave him the answer and he finished the piece in front of him and he asked for a second helping.

"Uncle Nick, you told me and Papa will stay here forever, will I go to school too? Papa say that I must go to school."

"Your Papa is right every kid must go to school."

"But what about work, if I go to school, I can't work."

"Your work is going to school and after doing your homework you will have you chores of course."

"I like horses, when Papa broke his leg in the mine I worked in the stables, Papa's boss wanted me in the mine, but Papa knows that I'm afraid of the dark so he said that I couldn't work there. I mucked the stables and I was happy because I was near all those horses, so I know everything about them..."

"Heath did you leave some cake or you ate it all by yourself?" Asked Tom with a smile from the door.

"Papa! I ate only two pieces, but there's plenty of it."

Nick observed the interaction between father and son, it was clear that the bond of love between them was very strong and he was pretty sure of that. In the last years Tom had changed a lot but Nick thought that his major change was on the character, before his dissapearance Tom Barkley didn't show his love but the man in front of him was pretty open with his sentiments and this maybe was a good change.

Victoria was at Tom's heel, it seemed that she didn't want leave Tom out of her sight, they talked a lot in the study and she learned that Heath was at the center of Tom's little universe, so far he didn't remember anything but she hoped that with love everything would set.

"Heath I want to introduce Victoria Barkley." He tactfully said, it was an awkward situation and he wanted to explain it to his son when they would be alone.

"Nice to meet you ma'am."

"Heath, your Papa has told me a great deal about you and I'm very happy to meet you. Nick, I think it's better to leave them alone, pretty soon the boys will be back from school and I need your help to explain them this situation."

"Papa look at the food! I've never seen that much and Uncle Nick told me that I could eat a second piece of the cake! There's plenty for you."

"Thanks Heath, I must admit I'm a bit hungry and this cake is welcome. I think there's a bit of space for a third helping and more milk for you while I eat my part. There's a story that I want to tell you."

"Papa I'm too old for fairy tales."

"No Heath, you aren't too old for a fairy tales but this one isn't one of them but it has a happy ending too."

While Tom was trying to tell the newfound truth about himself the buggy with Dr. Merar arrived at the ranch. Howard was quite puzzled when Duke arrived at his study with the tale of the sudden arrival of an amnesiac Tom Barkley, so he grabbed his bag and had headed to the ranch with the utmost haste.

"Victoria, I came as soon as Duke told me what happened."

"Thanks Howard, I'm sorry if I'm blunt, there's a cure?"

"Sorry but so far there's anything that we can do for amnesia, usually it is caused by an emotional or physical trauma. That's all I know about it, I will contact some doctors in San Francisco for more information but I don't want to give you too much hope, sometimes the patients regain all their memories...and sometime they don't:" He concluded.

"I was hoping that there was some kind of miracle cure..."

"I'm sorry but we can hope in a miracle, you already had one having Tom back alive. I want to check him up anyway."

"Howard you will find him changed, he lost a great deal of weight and he has a slight limp. He told me that he broke his leg some months ago in a cave in...and his kid is thin as a rail." Said Nick.

Both Victoria and Nick lead the doctor to the kitchen where Tom had just concluded his story. When Howard saw Heath for the first time he was amazed of the similitaries he shared with Tom. Heath looked at Victoria with unanswered questions too afraid and shy to ask.

"Heath, did your Papa tell you everything?" She gently asked, at Heath's nod, she continued, "do you have any question for me? Don't be afraid I won't eat you..." she added with a smile.

"Papa said you are his wife and he have two sons with you. Papa told me that they are my brothers...this makes you my Mama?" He asked with a small voice. "I don't remember my mama." He concluded with with tears falling on his cheeks.

"Only if you want, I will be happy to be your mama." She said engulfing him in a big hug. At first Heath wasn't sure what to do. He always craved for a mama and his papa's wife just told him that she could be so he returned the embrace.

'I only hope that with Nick and Jarrod will be that easy.' She thought

"Mother! Where are you, we're home!"

Chapter 3: Chapter 3  
"Nick, Jarrod please come with me and Uncle Nick in the study, there's something I need to tell you."

"Something wrong, are you all right? We saw doc's buggy outside, are you sick?" Jarrod asked while they were entering the study.

"No, but I've got news that will shock you. I really don't know how to start...Your father is alive!"

"Papa..." managed to say Nick.

"Where is he? And why now. Where was he during the last seven years?" asked an angry Jarrod.

"Jarrod it's not his fault."

"Was he in prison?"

"No. From what he said he was found seven years ago nearly dying with no memories of his past."

"And now he he remembers?" Asked Nick, hopefully.

"No, I'm sorry he doesn't, he arrived here at the ranch only because he heard that we were hiring."

"Are you sure that he's telling the truth?"

"Jarrod, he's your father and you must respect him, and yes he's telling the truth. He couldn't lie to save his life, worst poker player I've ever played with, and when I met him few hours ago he really didn't recognized me."

"But Uncle Nick..."

"Jarrod please stop...your mother and I will tell you everything and only when we are finished you can ask whatever you want."

When she was finished the results were as she predicted while Nick was elated about his father's sudden return Jarrod was more doubtful. He had memories of Tom and the last one was his promise to be back for Jarrod's birthday, he knew he was childish but he resented his father that he didn't keep his promise.

"Where is he?" asked an excited Nick, he didn't have memories of his father and all he knew was from the stories he had heard in the last seven years so he thought that his father was some kind of an hero, a knight on a white horse, he didn't grasp completely the fact that his father had another son from another woman but he was happy that his father was alive and he had a kid brother.

"Nick right now the doctor is with him in the kitchen..." Victoria didn't have time to finish her sentence when Nick sprang in the direction of the kitchen.

Tom had halfway eaten his slice of cake when he heard someone call him.

"Tom, I still can't believe that you are alive!"

"I reckon you know me, I think I must get used that everyone knows me and I don't remember."

"Sorry, my fault. My name is Howard Merar, your doctor and friend."

"Nice to meet you." Tom said a little bit embarrassed. The situation was awkward but he knew he must get used to it.

They chatted a bit while Howard examined Tom and Heath, he didn't find anything wrong, they both needed to gain some weight. He wanted to have a more thorough examination, but he decided that it could wait. He knew that soon the boys would here and he didn't want to delay their encounter with their father.

"Papa!" The yell preceded the owner of the voice. A black-haired boy entered the kitchen yelling at the top of his lungs. From what Victoria had told him, Tom surmised that the little yeller was Nick.

"Papa!" he said while he jumped at Tom.

"Nick?" Tom said hesitantly.

"Do you remember me?" asked a hopeful Nick.

"No, I'm sorry but your Mama told me a great deal about you."

"I don't remember you either, so I think we are even." He said. Tom awkwardly returned the hug.

Heath observed the exchange between his papa and the dark-haired boy, he knew he was his brother but he felt a pang of jealousy, his papa was his and right now he wasn't sure that he wanted to share him with anyone.

The hug between father and son was brief, Tom wasn't still at ease with the concept of a family he had forgotten.

"Nick, this is Heath, I think your Mama told you about him."

At first the two boys glared each other, Nick was the first to extend his hand and only at Tom's prompt Heath shock Nick's hand.

"Heath I'm happy I have a kid brother, I always wanted a kid brother to play with, Jarrod is too stiff and he thinks only of books and he doesn't want to play with me. Upstairs I have lots of soldiers, a fort and indians, we can play with if you want."

After hearing those words Heath started to think that maybe a big brother was a good thing, he has never had too many toys, even though he have to share his papa with him.

"Mother, Uncle now that Nick is not here I want to ask some questions."

"Jarrod as I said before I believe Tom's story..."

"Uncle Nick, Mother, that is not what that I was going to ask...I mean, do you realize what the people around will think?"

"Jarrod I thought I raised you better...you disappointed me with these words, you know that I don't care about what the people around here think. What should I do? Boot him out off the ranch? And what about your brother?"

"He's my half-brother, you said that he has an uncle around he can live with."

"Jarrod how dare only to think of this solution? You seriously think that by simply hiding him he would disappear? Do you really think that your father will abandon his child?"

"He did in the past," replied Jarrod with a small voice.

"Jarrod he never abandoned you or your brother, I know it's difficult for you but do you really think that? I know he broke his promise to you but the situation was out of his control he was seriously wounded, and then he couldn't remember a thing about his past."

"But Uncle Nick, maybe if he wasn't staying with that woman maybe his memory..."

"Jarrod if he wasn't staying with that woman he would have died."

"But Mother, how can you stand that your husband, who had married another woman and had another child with her?"

"Jarrod, maybe you can't understand right now but I will forever thankfully to Leah, she had saved Tom's life and it's no one fault what happened next, your father fell in love with another woman and from what he told me before we were quite similar. Jarrod you aren't a kid anymore so try not to hold a grudge against your father or more importantly against Heath, it's not their fault, the only culprits are the men who assaulted your father and left him for dead." Said Victoria, then she took Jarrod's hand in hers and together they entered in the kitchen.

"Tom, I want you to meet Jarrod."

"Father it's nice to meet you again; I'm happy that you are alive." He said with an even voice. Jarrod didn't hug his father but he simply extended his hand.

The tension in the air was thick and Nick decided to try to ease the situation.

"All right, I reckon Tom and Heath are bone tired, I think it's better they refresh themselves and have a change of clothes we can meet for dinner."

Victoria led Tom and Heath and showed them a guest room, for an unspoken agreement it had been decided that for the time being Tom would share the room with Heath, even though they were still married, for Tom, Victoria was a complete stranger.

"Papa! It's the biggest room I've ever seen and it has a huge bed!" Said an exited Heath.

"Tom this will be your room for the time being, I think both of you need some rest. The bathroom is at the end of the corridor. We have running water and I can send Silas to grab your saddle bags so you can both change after you get cleaned up."

"Victoria we don't have spare clothes...I had to sell them several days ago to buy some food." stated an embarrassed Tom.

"Well, I think your brother will be more than happy to give some of his, and I can find some Nick's old clothes for Heath in the attic...in a few days we will go in Stockton to buy some new ones."

The dinner was awkward, when they arrived at the table, Tom and Heath were unsure where to sit but after some strategic chairs moving Tom sat at the head of the table facing Victoria and Heath was at his right. Jarrod was sulking because he had to give up his chair next to his uncle and barely spoke a word to his father or Heath, Nick on the other hand talked all the time trying to bring Heath into the conversation. Both Heath and Tom were marveling at the huge quantities of food that laden the table, Silas had cooked all Tom's favorite foods, hoping that maybe this would help him to remember.

Soon after eating the cake, Heath fell asleep at the table and Tom took him upstairs and after a little bit, Jarrod and Nick went to bed. Tom bid them goodnight and was disappointed that only Nick replied.

"Want to join me for a smoke and maybe a game of billiards?" Asked Nick.

Tom looked around for Victoria, and he saw her heading upstairs, for a some brief moments he was tempted to follow her but he decided to go with Nick.

Nick handed Tom a fat cigar and started to pour some whiskey in two glasses.

"No, thanks but I don't drink." Said Tom, refusing the proffered glass.

"Since when you don't drink? I mean before...I mean you always had a shot of whiskey after dinner."

"Before Leah's death, I enjoyed a shot of whiskey every once and awhile, when she died the world crumbled, I was lost without her, and I've started to drink, heavily. All that mattered back then was the bottle, it was at the first place..."

"What made you change you mind?"

"I hit Heath, he was crying I reckon he was hungry, I'm not sure. Luckily that day Matt was at the ranch and saw everything, he was madder than an hornet's nest. He took me outside and dunked me in pond nearby, it was the end of winter and the water was freezing you can imagine that I sobered up immediately then he started to yell at me that he would take Heath with him if I would have continued to drink...you know what changed my mind? When we went back inside, I saw Heath staying away from me, seeking refuge in his uncle. My son was scared of me; at that moment I decided to never touch alcohol and I swore on Leah's grave."

Nick was taken aback by Tom's words, he always pictured his brother as a strong man, but it seemed that he had some weak points. He decided not to drink his whiskey as well and simply play some billiards and enjoy the cigars.

"Nick, is there someone that is called Heath that I knew before the accident?"

"Our father, a few days before leaving you came to me grinning announcing that Victoria was with child, you already decided to name him after our father."

"And the child Victoria was expecting?"

"It was a false alarm."

"Our father he's still alive, do I have other siblings?"

"Yes to both questions. Father is alive and kicking in San Francisco and he's living with our sister and her husband. I think tomorrow first thing I do is go there with the first train. I think it's better to call it a night. I reckon tomorrow will be quite tiring for both of us, I'll bet that by tomorrow afternoon half Stockton will be here at the ranch."

When Tom entered in the room he was sharing with Heath he looked at him for a long moment, and sent a prayer of thanks, this morning he was worrying that he couldn't provide a decent meal to his own son and now he was one of the richest man in California.

Chapter 4: Chapter 4  
Finally I've finished...a little bit late it's really finished I wish to thanks to my beta schoolmarm

The following day Nick Barkley left Stockton on the first train bound to San Francisco, there his father lived with his sister; he was looking forward to announcing to him the merry news about Tom's sudden return from death.

A few hours later he was facing the entrance of his sister's house.

" Nick what a nice surprise, you didn't send any telegram; is everything all right at the ranch?"

" Yes father, I have wonderful news…I really don't know how to start: Tom is alive?"

" Are you sure; during these last years we have followed many false leads, but none of them led to Tom, how did you discover that he's alive!"

" He simply arrived at the ranch yesterday."

"What? And what was his explanation? He went missing for seven years leaving his wife and two young sons and then he simply reappears seven years later?"

"He has a pretty good justification: he has amnesia. He arrived at the ranch looking for a job, he didn't recognize anyone; we are strangers to him."

" Maybe he will recognize his father, I always hoped that he was alive and I don't care that he doesn't recognize me; the most important thing is that he's alive. When is the next train to Stockton?"

" In a few hours. I've already booked the tickets for you and Anne, there's one more thing: during these seven years Tom was married and fathered a son."

" She's with him?"

" No, maybe I'm selfish, but thank God she died two years ago...I cringe at the thought that she could be alive."

" While we wait for your sister let's celebrate with some whiskey."

The news of Tom Barkley's return spread like wildfire in Stockton; the first well-wishers arrived just after the family had finished breakfast that was spent in a heavy silence. Neither Jarrod or Nick went to school that morning, Victoria thought that it was better for them to keep them away from Stockton where she was sure they would be assaulted by well wishers and more important they needed time to reacquaint with their father.

She put Silas in charge of screening the visitors, she gave him a short list with names of old friends who were allowed to enter and meet Tom, the others would receive a polite decline. After a few visitors she put a stop to all visits, even the ones from the closest friends. Tom appeared more and more ill at ease with each visit. Their friends tried to be helpful, to recall shared moments spent together, but to their chagrin Tom wasn't able to recall their friendship and Tom appeared more tired every passing visit and after awhile Victoria decided to put a stop to all visits.

" Tom do you want to go outside, you look that you have spent enough time cooped up? I think Heath and Nick will be happy to join us, I think they spent the majority of the morning upstairs and I'm pretty sure they will appreciate some fresh air."

After few minutes the four were heading toward the corral.

" Papa me and Nick played all morning with his soldiers upstairs I've never seen so many and he told me that they are mine too!" exclaimed Heath.

" Nick is your brother and he's happy to share his toys with you," piped in Victoria, "And when you receive toys you will share with him as well, " she concluded.

" Toys? Real toys for me? Uncle Matt gave me a toy soldier last Christmas and papa made me a wooden horse, but I lost the soldier," asked a doubtful Heath.

" Victoria was right, I reckon in a few days we will go to Stockton and I have the impression that you will receive new toys and clothes and I'm pretty sure that when uncle Matt will arrive he will have a surprise for you," answered Tom.

" Uncle Matt will come here? Nick my uncle Matt is the bestest uncle in the world he always tells me funny stories and he always gives me candies."

" Yes, I asked McCaòò to send him a telegram."

" Sorry Victoria if I didn't tell you in advance…"

" Tom, you are my husband even if you don't remember and I would do anything to make you happy. From what you told me Matt Simmons is as good man and friend and I don't see why he shouldn't be here; just write the telegram and I will send a hand to town to send it," interrupted Victoria

Tom watched Victoria, he still didn't remember her, but she shared many qualities with Leah. She looked like her in some ways; maybe he fell in love with Leah because of this resemblance. He had felt safe with her and he still felt the void in his heart caused by Leah's death. He didn't know if he would ever regain his memory, but he would give a try with Victoria by staying near her. Even though he didn't remember her he felt at ease, complete and safe.

" Victoria, where is Jarrod?"

" He's studying or at least he's using this excuse to be somewhere else. You have to understand that your last words with him were that you would be back for his birthday; just give him some time. He's a smart young man who will realize pretty soon that it wasn't your fault for not being here all these years."

The rest of the day was spent as a family, Tom spoke at length with Victoria about his years spent away from her and how he struggled during the last two years. He spoke highly of his brother in law Matt, in many way he saved his life twice: the first one when he saved him from the storm and the second one when he helped him overcome his pain at losing Leah. Heath and Nick spent the time playing with new puppies and starting a friendship that would last for the rest of their lives; meanwhile Jarrod observed them from his room and was starting to realize that maybe he was childish, but he was too stubborn to admit aloud.

Nick Barkley had never seen his father so nervous as they approached the ranch. During the hours spent on the train he and his sister asked question after question which he answered as well as he could. He had to admit that he barely knew the new version of his brother. Finally the house emerged from the horizon and the buggy stopped in front of the entrance. Heath Barkley slowly got off the buggy and he slowly approached the door. He was so happy that his son was alive even though he wouldn't recognized him and he had this strange wish that, maybe his presence would stir some memories in Tom's mind. As usual it was Silas who opened the door.

" Welcome back Mister Barkley, your son and his family have just finished dinner and are in the parlor."

He slowly advanced toward the room closely followed by Nick and Anne. Victoria was the first one to realize that her father in law was arrived.

" Father, I'm so happy you have arrived."

" Grandfather! " chorused Nick and Jarrod.

Heath Barkley slowly reached for his son and engulfed him in a bear's hug not leaving him time to react.

" Oh Tom I'm so happy; deep in my heart I've always knew that you were alive." he said sobbing.

Nick was amazed; he had seen his father cry only when his mother had died several years ago.

Tom didn't know how to react. This man who was engulfing him was his father, but he didn't recall him; it was an awkward situation, but Nick came to his aid.

" Father, as you can see he doesn't recall you. Tom, as you could easily surmise this is your father and this lady near me is your sister Anne."

" Uncle Nick, does that make him my grandpa? " asked Heath.

" Yes, Father this smart boy is your grandson and, Heath, she is your Aunt Anne."

" I've never had a grandpa or an aunt, but I have another Uncle who is coming soon."

" Nice to meet you Heath; you know you look like your father when he was your age."

The following conversation between father and son was strained. In Tom's eyes his father was a complete stranger they didn't have a common conversational subject until they finally found it by focusing on talking about Heath's namesake who was being fussed over by his newfound aunt. Slowly the time passed and one by one each member of the Barkley family said their farewell and went to bed.

" Pa, I'm happy here, I have an aunt, a grandpa and two brothers, " said a sleepy Heath in the privacy of their room – and toys. ," he concluded.

" And I am happy that you are happy." Tom didn't said it aloud, but he was happy also that if anything should happen to him Heath would have a family; yes there was Matt, but lately he was associating with with an odd woman who wasn't a motherly type.

The following day the whole Barkley clan went to Stockton; they wanted to show that they believed wholehearted to Tom's amnesia to stop the busybodies and their lies. Tom and Heath needed new clothes and others things. Tom and Heath were dumbstruck at the amount of money that was spent during the day. Tom tried feebly to put a stop to the shopping spree, but he had to face both Victoria and the rest of the family. He had no memories of them, but he knew that he would lose this particular battle.

They stopped at the Stockton school that both Jarrod and Nick attended to enroll Heath in the first grade.

" Mrs. Barkley, I've just heard the happy news," said Mr. Jones, the principal, while he welcomed the Barkleys.

" Mr. Barkley, my name is Mr. Jones."

" Nice to meet you. I'm here to enroll my son Heath Winter…I mean Barkley. He didn't have too much schooling, but he knows his letter and numbers."

"It's not a problem; if he is smart as his brothers he won't have any problems."

" You know Victoria I always feared that I couldn't give my son any opportunities to attend school after her mother's death. We wandered from town to town while I was looking for any job…" said Tom while going out from the school.

" Tom, Heath isn't your son, he's our son."

At these words Heath looked at Victoria hopefully; it was the second time she had called him son. He really didn't have any memories of his mother, but his father's wife reminded him of her mother. He would ask his father if it would be all right for him to call her Mama. He was excited to start school. He had attended one only for a few days, but he liked it.

The rest of the day passed quickly. Tom and Heath shared equal time with different members of the family, Heath and his daughter tried to made Tom remember, telling him several episodes of his childhood. When they were with Heath they began to know Tom's son better; Heath was a polite and smart boy who put his father at the center of the universe and deep inside him he was afraid he could lose him since the close call he had during the cave in.

The dinner was very lively, Heath Barkley had a booming voice and in Victoria's opinion Nick had inherited it.

"Heath, I reckon you are happy that tomorrow you will start school, " said Anne.

" Yes Aunt Anne, when we were in Midas I went for a while, but then papa had an accident in the mine and I had to work…" he replied.

"But you are too young to work.," interrupted his grandfather; Nick had told his father about Tom's brush with death, but he didn't tell about Heath's part in earning during Tom's convalescence.

" It's not a big deal grandpa, I worked in the livery stable, the mine owner wanted me as a charge boy, but papa knew I'm afraid of the dark so he told him no…we needed the money," explained Heath.

" Heath I'm proud that you are my grandson."

It was in their room that Heath asked the big question.

" Papa I'm wondering….do you think mama would be angry if I call Mrs. Barkley mama? I don't remember her, but I want to have a mama and she reminds me of her."

"Honey, I think she would be happy; she always wanted your happiness. You know Victoria already considers you as her son and I think she would be honored to be called mama, and you can ask her tomorrow morning before going to school."

Heath was so excited that he was awake at the dawn; he wanted to go downstairs, but Tom pointed out that it was too early and the rest of the family would still be sleeping so Tom decided to read him a story from a book he took from the family library the previous night.

The family was gathered in the dining room when Tom and Heath arrived. Tom took his place in front of Victoria and Heath next to him.

"Ma'am, I have a question for you," asked Heath hesitantly , "You are my papa's wife and I'm wondering if I can call you mama?"

"Heath do you remember the first time we met? You asked me if I could be your mama and my answer was yes, so I don't see anything wrong to call me mama. You are a smart little boy and any woman would be delighted to have you as a son."

Everyone in the room smiled with the sole exception of Jarrod 'how dare him, to call her mama, he isn't her son, he isn't my brother, it's his fault and his mother's that papa didn't come back sooner' he thought darkly. No one noticed how morose Jarrod was till the moment they went to the stable to get the horses.

" Father I don't see why you need to come with us? Nick and I know our way to the school pretty well."

" Jarrod, it's the first day of school for Heath; maybe you don't remember, but he went with you on your first day of school."

" But mother he wasn't here for Nick's…."

" Don't say one more word, Jarrod Thomas Barkley, or you will have a close meeting with my wooden spoon; since your father's return you have been uncouth. Maybe you should learn your manners again."

" Sorry mother," he replied while mounting and urging his to a slow trot.

" Tom, I'm sorry; he usually doesn't behave in this manner."

" Don't worry, Victoria. I think we will have to give him some time. See you later."

" Tom, if you want I can come with you."

" Don't worry; I'm a big boy and I think my little brother can protect me," he replied laughing.

Victoria stood still till the four riders disappeared on the horizon. One of the things she missed most during Tom's disappearance was his laughter and lopsided smile, but he was back; maybe he wasn't himself, but he was back and this was the most important thing.

After delivering Nick and Heath the two men returned to the ranch and along with their father they toured the ranch. Nick showed his big brother the work that had to be done around there daily.

The following days passed smoothly; Heath made new friends in school and bonded with his newfound family. Tom's father and sister left Stockton after a few days with the promise that pretty soon the family should have come to visit them in San Francisco.

Jarrod, Nick and Heath rode by themselves to school each day, but Jarrod distanced himself from his two younger brothers as soon the corral was out of sight.

" Nick why doesn't Jarrod like me?" Heath asked one day, innocently.

" I don't know; he's always stiff and full of himself, he thinks he's pretty smart only because he reads books. I'm very happy that you are here; finally I have a brother who I can play with."

" Maybe he doesn't like me because I'm not smart," concluded Heath.

It was during recess that trouble arrived for Heath; a group of older boys corralled him, after making sure that Nick wasn't around.

" Hey, bastard, do you like the life with the Barkleys? I'm sure your mother was a looker for keeping Tom Barkley away from his rightful family."

" I've heard that your name ain't Barkley, but Winter…maybe your father ain't Tom Barkley."

" Bastard, I think once your father remembers he will send you away; after all you aren't his real son."

The jeers continued for several minutes. Heath was on verge of tears; so far he had had no problems and those big boys were laughing at him with no reason, they were teasing him using words that he didn't know the meaning of. He was saved by the bell and he returned to class and was tempted to ask the teacher the meaning of the words he had heard during the recess, but he had the feeling it was better to avoid it.

On his way back to the ranch he was so subdued that Nick asked what was going on, but he was able to make up a story about losing a marble.

He took courage when he entered Jarrod's room; his brother was pretty smart and even if he hated him he was sure he would tell him the meaning of the words he had heard that morning.

" I'm studying, I don't have time to lose with you brat."

" I'm sorry Jarrod, but I have a question for you; you are pretty smart and I think you can help."

" I think 'papa' will help you with your homework when he come back from the range," he said sarcastically.

" It's not homework; today some boys called me some names and I don't know their meaning."

" Ask 'mama' I'm pretty busy right now."

" Please Jarrod, I know you don't like me, but I think they are bad words."

" All right, just make it fast I don't have time to waste."

" What is a bastard?"

Jarrod was at a loss at that word; he would never have imagined that Heath would ask the meaning of this word. He didn't know how to answer; he was tempted to brush him off, to send him to ask to their father, but he wasn't a coward and started to think of the best answer.

" Heath you heard this word at school, didn't you?" he started.

" Yes it was during recess, some older boys told me that word and others, but they kept on saying that I'm a bastard…"

" Heath you are right, it's a bad word and you shouldn't say…it means that the mother and the father of a child aren't married."

" But mama and papa were married, Uncle Matt was there!"

" But father was already married; he broke the law. You can't be married to two women."

" He didn't know he was married…he thought that he was alone. Papa always obey the law; he didn't break it. If you don't remember that you are married you don't break the law if you marry another woman. Papa was happy with mama, but I'm sure he would never have married her if he remembered that he was married to your mama."

" Heath you are right, but for the law the marriage between father and your mama isn't valid. One could say that father faked his amnesia…"

" But papa really didn't remember anything, he loves me and I think he would never leave me unless he wouldn't remember me and I think the same thing is true for you or Nick," interrupted Heath.

Those simple words started Jarrod to really think about his father and the real reason why he left him all those years ago. It wasn't his father's fault nor Heath's; it was fate and maybe it was the fate that made his father come back home.

" Sometimes law is unfair, but you aren't a bastard; father recognized you at the birth so you are his son the same as myself or Nick."

" But Jarrod what should I say to those boys next time?"

" Just ignore them; they are bullies and they will get tired if you don't react to their words. Remember words don't hurt."

" Thanks, Jarrod. Those boys said something about my mama, after they said it they laughed and run away. I've heard it before and when I repeated papa smacked my bottom…if I tell you in your ear you won't tell papa, you promise?" asked Heath. The blond boy slowly whispered what he had heard and Jarrod blushed from hearing that five-letter word from the mouth of someone so young…

" Heath it's a really bad word and you must promise never to say it again."

" I promise, but what does it mean, why did they use it for my mama?"

" It means…" Jarrod didn't know what to answer, he wanted to maintain Heath's innocence as long as possible "Sometimes ladies work in the saloon, you know them?" at Heath's nodding he continued " it's not a good job, real ladies don't work there."

" But mama never worked in a saloon! Those boys are wrong!"

" Yes they are, they are bullies and they pick on younger boys because they are cowards."

" Thanks Jarrod I knew you were pretty smart and I'm sorry if you lost time for me."

" Don't worry. I'm your older brother and it's my job to help you and tomorrow during recess call me or Nick if those boys come near you," replied Jarrod relieved that Heath didn't inquired about the kind of the job that was done inside the saloon. "Heath, another thing; I don't hate you. Maybe I was a bit angry at you because papa didn't come home sooner, but now I understand that it was nobody's fault. What about going downstairs and eating some cake like real brothers?"

At those words Heath jumped at Jarrod and hugged him with his small arms.

"I'm happy you like me now, I have a book I want to read, but it's too difficult. I asked Nick, but he refused; maybe it's too difficult for him too, do you want to help me?"

"Sure, but before we do there's a cake with our names down in the kitchen…one more thing don't tell father or mother about what happened this morning; it will be our secret."

A few hours later Victoria was pleased to hear Jarrod speak in a civil tone to Tom and was stunned at hearing his older son ask Heath to play checkers. Slowly Heath and Tom were merging into the family. She didn't know if, or when, Tom would regain his memory, but it was becoming a secondary matter. She had noticed the glances Tom gave her; they were the same he had when he had met her so many years ago…she knew he was falling in love with her again.

Tom was happy that Jarrod stopped holding grudges against him and started to treat Heath as a brother. He kept on observing Victoria and suddenly realize that he had the same sensation of butterflies he had when he met Leah; he realized that he was falling in love again.

Chapter 5: Chapter 5  
I wish to thanks my beta schoolmarm again

It was near Thanksgiving that Heath received a surprise visitor; he was playing in the corral with the Nick and some puppies when a lone rider arrived. Heath looked at him and as soon as he dismounting from the horse he jumped in his arms.

" Uncle Matt you arrived! I'm so happy, did you bring me some candies? Do you know that I have another uncle, an aunt and a grandpa!"

" Hold your horses, Squirt! Let me catch my breath and, yes, I have something for you and for your brothers as well. My, my, Heath, you have grown up a great deal since the last time I saw you; next time I see you I think you will be shaving," he replied with a wink.

" Nick, Nick! He's MY uncle Matt...the bestest uncle in the whole world."

" Nice to meet you, sir," said politely Nick while he extended his hand.

" No need to call me sir; after all we are in some way relatives. You can call me uncle if you want."

" I'm happy you came here. Heath told me a bunch of thing about you and I was looking forward to meeting you."

" Heath, where is your pa?"

"On the range. He's checking the fences with Uncle Nick; he's his brother. I reckon he will arrive near lunchtime; Uncle Nick keeps on saying that this is a working ranch and papa is away everyday, but I have Nick, Jarrod and mama. I mean papa's wife...I asked her if it was all right to call her that and she said yes. You know I don't remembered my first mama well and I always wanted a new mama like all other children..."

" Heath don't worry; it's fine with me; your papa was really sad after she died and I always hoped that he could find someone who could him make him happy again. I'm sure that my sister would have wished the same; her first priorities were always you and your papa and your happiness."

" Sir...I mean Uncle Matt if you come with us I will introduce my mother. I'm sure she will be very happy to finally meet you; after all you saved my father's life."

" That was my sister's doing, I merely helped her only after he pleaded to me."

" Boy howdy, for sure this is a big house," he said aloud when the trio entered the foyer.

" Mother!" Nick yelled when he was near the staircase.

" Does he always yell so aloud?"

" No, usually he's louder"

" Nick, how many times do I have to tell you to not shout inside? Especially when we have guests."

" Mama he's my Uncle Matt!" said an excited Heath.

" I'm very pleased to meet you at last. Tom and Heath keep on talking about you and I personally must thank you for all you did for my husband."

" Mrs. Barkley I'm not the one who saved Tom's life..."

" Mr. Simmons, sorry if I interrupt you, but Tom told me everything, I'm talking about what you did after Tom's...your sister death, you saved him from something more terrible than death."

" Mrs. Barkley, I did what I did for my love for my sister and nephew. Heath had lost his mother and I didn't want him to lose his father too. He was lost when Leah died and the only thing I gave him was a reason to go on."

Victoria and Matt Simmons went to the dinning room for a cup of tea while the boys drank hot chocolate; they chatted about how Tom was found and how Matt was able to save him from the depression he had following Leah's death. Victoria was amazed at Matt's personality; one moment he was strong and sure of himself the next one he was like a lost puppy looking for someone. He had been at the same time the anchor for Tom and Tom was the anchor for himself.

They were interrupted by Tom's arrival.

" Nick, you look far better than the last time I saw you," said Matt while engulfing Tom in a bear's hug.

" Yes, things changed for the good finally; one minute I was dirt poor, scrambling for the next meal, despairing that I couldn't provide Heath with the basic needs and the next moment I find out that I'm one of the richest man of the valley."

" For sure fate can play strange games; how's the memory by the way?"

" Still don't remember a thing, I have still got to get used to being called Tom; you know my brother's name is Nick and each time someone calls him I turn around too."

" Since I've known you I've always called you Nick and it will take lots of time to call you Tom."

" Matt you know I'm so happy that you are finally here; I hope I didn't ruin your plans with my telegram."

" Not at all Nick...I mean Tom. I must admit you saved me. As you know I was back in Strawberry; sometimes I have the stupidest ideas, and guess who I met there? Dear old Martha...she was still hitting on me; even after all these years she is still in love with me and she's loonier than the last time I saw her. I was out of excuses. Would you believe that she proposed to me? She still has the old hotel she inherited from her husband, but of course it has nearly no clients at all, as soon as I received your telegram I ran away from that forsaken town and I hope never to set foot there again in my life."

" For the time being you will stay here; there's plenty of room and Heath will be so happy to have you around, and I reckon you have gained two more nephews: Nick and Jarrod."

" I've already met Nick and I'm already his 'uncle'."

" Come with me I'll show your room...Did I said something funny?" asked Tom.

" No Nick, I mean I've would never have imagined that you would have so much money that you would have to show my room...do you remember the ranch? A bedroom and a kitchen and it was enough and here how many rooms?"

" I must admit I don't know, I've never asked Victoria," replied an embarrassed Tom.

Time flew with Matt around. Tom had someone he knew around with whom he didn't have to play the act of the mighty Tom Barkley; he could be Nick Winter. So far he hadn't told a soul, but it was becoming tiresome to be Tom Barkley, the man he was before the amnesia, but whose life he didn't remember. Victoria was another matter; he was deeply in love with her, but so far he remained in the guest room with Heath. Yes, he was legally married to her, but since he didn't remembered it he felt that it was inappropriate to share the master room with her, even though she hinted a couple of times.

" Tom, I don't want to sound ungrateful, but I need to do something. So far I have been your guest, but it can't continue. I want to work; you know that ranching isn't my cup of tea, I was thinking of looking for work in Stockton."

" Matt you are right; if you don't mind my brother can help you. The Barkley name can open a lot of doors in the valley; you were born to run a hotel or something similar."

" Thanks you so muck Nick...Gosh I keep on calling you Nick. I don't think I will ever get accustomed to calling you Tom."

" It doesn't matter, in my mind I'm still Nick Winter...you know I'm afraid I won't ever get my memory back; when I see Nick and Jarrod I know that they are my own, but in my heart I still feel that Heath is my son. I'm developing affection for them, but so far not a real father's love. With Victoria it's a totally different thing, I'm deeply in love with her, but I don't know if the feeling I have for her is because she's so similar to Leah or because deep inside my soul I remember her."

" Maybe you fell in love with Leah because she was so similar to Victoria," Matt somberly added.

One week later Matt Simmons was the new assistant manager of the new Cattlemen Club; the owner was hoping for a great success and having someone related to the Barkleys working for the club wouldn't hurt the business.

Heath was still the target of some bullies in school; they treated him verbally. They were too afraid of Nick's reaction; he ignored them, but deep inside him something remained of those taunting words.

Tom so far didn't make any decision regarding the ranch or any of the businesses related to the growing Barkley empire; he left all of them on the capable shoulders of his brother Nick; after all he had been running the ranch for the last seven years and he didn't have a clue about how to operate it. Nick had started to show his brother how thing were done and Tom had started to help him with the books, but nothing more.

The turning point was a simply accident. Tom was good with horses; he had some gift that permitted him to break in even the most wild horse. This hadn't changed with the amnesia. He was breaking in the last stallion when the horse bucked suddenly and he literally flew in the air and landed hard, breaking the wooden fence. The men who surrounded the corral watching him break the horse went immediately to his aid; one of them jumped on the nearest horse and raced to Stockton to fetch the doctor. Tom was taken to his room and Victoria was at his side when the doctor arrived.

" Did he regain consciousness?" he asked.

" He hasn't moved a muscle. I already checked for broken bones, but I wasn't able to find any...I think he hit his head...what do you think? "

The doctor spent several minutes checking Tom for any internal bleeding or any broken bones.

" You are right, Victoria, no broken bones and I don't think he's bleeding inside; the only visible wound is the head injury. They are tricky; you never know what can happen with them. The only cure I know is prayer; you can fix a broken arm, but so far medicine hasn't found a way to repair the brain. I'll stay for a couple of hours, but then I need to return to Stockton; if anything changes send someone. I will be back as soon as possible "

" Thanks; can you send a telegram to Nick? He's in San Francisco for business and I want him back."

" Sure, Victoria, I will do it as soon I'm back."

The children, when they were back from school, were informed of the situation. Heath was the most worried, even though he thought of Victoria as his mama, Tom was the constant presence during his brief life and he was distressed that he could lose him. All the taunting he had heard during the last few weeks popped into his mind. They would send him to an orphanage if his papa died. What if he regained his memory, would he forgot about him?

The whole family stayed at Tom's bedside for several hours; at one point Victoria tried to convince the children to take a break, but with no avail. After all they had inherited the Barkley's stubbornness. It was dark when Tom started to stir.

" What happened? It seems that a house fell on my head..."

" You fell from a horse you were breaking."

" Victoria, what happened to you...you seem older than...oh my God my memory, I remember everything, you the children..."

At these words Heath ran off; so now his papa was remembering and he had forgotten everything about him. No one in the room noticed his disappearance since they were making a ruckus about Tom's sudden return of memory. Heath didn't have a plan; when he stopped to regain his breath he decided to go to his uncle. After all he was all the family he had so he started to walk toward Stockton.

" Papa do you remember me now?" asked an excited Nick.

" Yes, one of my last memories was you throwing a temper tantrum because you lost your wooden horses. Your yells haven't changed at all; and you, Jarrod, all grown up. Now I remember my promise about your birthday. I'm sorry; you know that I bought some books for a surprise present."

" Father it doesn't matter, it wasn't your fault"

" My beloved Victoria now I remember everything, the love I have for you..."

" Mother where is Heath, he was here few minutes ago?" interrupted Jarrod.

" Maybe he had to go," piped in Nick. (right expressions to sat going to the bathroom?)

" Nick go and check; I have a feeling he isn't there," said Victoria.

After few minutes Nick returned.

" I looked around, but he's nowhere. I couldn't find him anywhere."

" Vic, please help me I have to find him; he's my son," said Tom trying to get up from the bed.

" No you stay put. Heath is my son as well; first, before panicking the children, I will look through the house. Jarrod, please go to the bunk house and ask one of the hands to go and fetch the doctor; after you should look for Heath in the corral and in the stables. I know it's one of his favorite spots here."

After thirty minutes they were back in Tom's room.

" Did you find him?" asked a panicked Tom.

" No, we looked everywhere; he simply disappeared in thin air."

" What did he have in mind, why did he run away?"

" Father, maybe I have an idea. Heath is still a small child and maybe he thought that when you regained your memory you would forgot about him."

" Maybe you are right, Jarrod, but how could he have imagined that?"

" Papa during recess some boys told him so several times," added Nick

" It's freezing outside and starting to rain. Tom, I arrived as soon as possible, and I see you are pretty fine, Josh told me that you remember..."

" Howard, there are more pressing matters right now. We can't find Heath, we think he run away; did you see anybody while coming here?"

" Sorry Tom, but it's pitch black outside and I was in a hurry; I didn't see anyone."

" Tom, I will send the hands to look for him; don't worry they will find him."

" Victoria, he's so small and he's afraid of the dark. I wish I could do something more."

" Tom your job now is getting well; you can't look for him in your condition."

Heath was having second thoughts about getting to his uncle; it was getting colder and he was drenched to the bone and he was scared. It was a moonless night and it was pitch black around him; he could barely recognize the road ahead of him. He had lost his sense of time and he was about to give up and return to the ranch when he recognized Stockton's outskirts. He sped up his pace; his uncle was living in the back room of the Cattlemen's Club. It wasn't the ideal situation, but it was enough for him.

" For God's sake it's the middle of the night what do you..." was Matt's response at Heath's pounding on the door.

" It's me, Uncle Matt."

" Heath, what are you doing all alone? It's pouring out; come inside quickly; you are freezing. Why are you all alone here, does you papa know that you are here?"

" He doesn't remember me anymore," said Heath while he ran toward his uncle, who, a few seconds later, engulfed him in a bear's hug.

" What do you mean with that, it's impossible?"

" Today he fell from a horse and when he woke up he remembered everything. Some boys at school told me that when someone regains their memory forgot the new memories."

" Heath they were only joking," said Matt, trying to maintain a straight face. He wished that Heath could maintain this innocence as long as possible. "Let me dry you off; for sure you don't want to get a cold. Your parents will be sick with worry; you stay put here and I will go to the livery to get a buggy so I can get you back home safe and sound."

One hour later they were on the way to the ranch. Matt bundled Heath in one of his shirts and coats since his clothes were too wet to wear. After few miles they met with some of the hands who were looking for Heath. They were happy that the little boy was safe and turned their horses toward the ranch where they were able to tell the great news and get warm. When half an hour later Heath and his uncle arrived at the ranch the whole family, minus Tom, was at the doorstep waiting for them.

" Heath I don't know if I have to spank or hug you; everyone was worried, why did you run away?"

" I'm sorry, mama, but I was scared..." he said while he sobbed on his mother's bosom.

Victoria looked at Matt puzzled; in a few sentences Matt confirmed her worst fears.

" Now, young man, your papa is upstairs waiting for you..."

" Does he know I am?" he asked, still unsure that his uncle had told him the truth.

" Of course, Squirt, don't be so..." Nick wasn't able to finish his sentence because Heath was halfway to Tom's room.

Tom was trying to get up from bed when Heath entered breathless. He saw his son jump on the bed and bury his head in his shoulder; after few seconds he could heard Heath softly sobbing.

" Heath, I'm here, don't worry I still remember you.." Tom said trying to sooth his son.

" I was afraid; the boys at school told me that you would forget about me if you remembered, they told me..."

" Shh they aren't doctors; they are only bullies who enjoy picking on a younger child. Now I remember everything, but you are still part of my heart."

" Do you still love me, or do you love more Nick and Jarrod? After all they are you real sons"

" Heath I don't know who put in your head those ideas, this nonsense about real sons, but I love you as the others."

" At school some boys told me that I'm a bastard, that I'm not your real son because you weren't really married with mama..."

" Why didn't you tell me anything?"

" I spoke with Jarrod and he explained to me, but I still wasn't sure; he told me that bastard was a bad word and I was afraid that you would use a bar of soap like last time I said a bad word..."

" Honey you did the right thing talking with Jarrod, but you should have talked with me; it's a father's job to protect his children, all his children," he remarked to make his point.

By this time all the family was in Tom's room and Heath was gently scolded by everyone; Victoria reassured him that his place was with the family. Heath was so tired that he fell asleep during Nick's tirade about his foolishness and how dumb kid brothers can be sometimes.

The following days were days of celebration; the Barkley mansion was filled with guests. Tom's father and sister came from San Francisco and Tom was able to speak as a son to his father; (did I make sense at all) he was amazed on how aged his father was. He noticed that his father had changed since the last time he remembered. Now that he remembered everything he realized how full of himself he was before his memory loss. He knew that even though he had regained his memory he wasn't the man who left for Strawberry several years ago.

Several months later...

Tom was like a caged tiger; he kept on walking back and forth in front of the door, every few minutes he looked in the direction, hoping for any news.

" Nick, I have to go in, it's taking too much time..."

" Tom, you heard Victoria; she doesn't want you inside. There's the doctor and the midwife with her and I think they are more than enough, you would only be a bother."

" Yes, Tom, stay put. It's better that way; do you remember what happened when Heath was born?" Matt started to explain to Nick. " This fool wanted to stay with Leah, thinking that he could take everything and guess what? He fainted, so the doctor had two patienta, thank God everything went smoothly with Heath..."

A loud cry interrupted him; the children who so far had been quiet started to get anxious.

" Is mama all right? Is she in pain?"

" Yes, Heath, mama is all right; don't worry. Everything will be all right and pretty soon you will have a little brother or sister."

" But I don't know how to be a big brother, I don't want to be bossy like Nick."

" I'm not bossy..."

" Yes you are..."

" Boys keep it quiet..."

Tom didn't have to finish the sentence because Doctor Merar exited from the master room; he was exhausted and Tom wasn't able to read his expression.

" Howard, how is Victoria and the child?"

" Tom, it is better if you come inside."

" Oh my God, something happened..."

" No, Tom, everything went smoothly, but it's better if you come with me."

Tom looked back and he took a deep breath and entered, leaving the others questioning themselves about the doctor's words.

Several minutes later Howard was back with Tom; the latter was paler than a ghost, but he was grinning like a maniac.

" Howard, I didn't faint; I was simply overwhelmed by the news..."

" Tom, according to my medical books you lost consciousness and that means you fainted ..."

The rest of the family who were waiting for news looked at the couple eager for news...

"Is it a boy or a girl?"

" There is a tiny complication; something that I would never imagined...I want to announce the birth of Matt, Gene and Leah Barkley," said Tom.


End file.
